If you have never believed that you create your own happiness then changing this belief is going to take some effort. The good news is that none of the Simple Steps are hard. They just require consistent application. The fun part is testing them out.
There are two Simple Steps to help you choose happiness. Today I’m posing Simple Step #6 “Just Say NO!” prepares you to combat the negativity your mind creates.
Simple Step #6 “Just Say NO!”
In this Simple Step when you catch yourself falling into negativity and placing blame:
1) Acknowledge your thoughts. State specifically what you were thinking.
2) Stop and say “NO” out loud.
3) Refocus and rephrase
Here are some examples of how this works:
- Acknowledge: “I was mad at my friend for not calling.”
- Say NO: “No I’m not going to let myself be upset.”
- Refocus: “I was expecting my friend to call. Something must have come up. I’ll call her.”
- Acknowledge: “I want to yell at my wife for not having dinner ready when I came home.”
- Say NO: “No I’m not going there.”
- Refocus: “I love it when my wife has dinner ready when I come home from work. She must have had a busy day too. We can make dinner together and have time to talk.”
Don’t you feel better when you have control of how you feel? Sure it takes some time in the beginning. After all you’ve been in a negative place for a while. In the long run however when you consistently practice “Just Say NO!” you’ll create a foundation for overall improvement.
In addition to being more positive yourself you will start to notice the difference in those around you when you are more relaxed and collaborative. It is in that moment that you raise the bar for everyone else.